My First Blog

My First Bloghttp://laidebird.blog.co.uk/en-EUhourly82000-01-01T12:00+00:00My First Bloghttp://laidebird.blog.co.uk/http://data5.blog.de/design/preview/4f/4556e27326021c409b0dc9c3055fbb_160x200.jpgThe worm turnshttp://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/28/the_worm_turns~1990245/2007-03-28T10:42:47+02:00 I've laid down the ground rules at last. I've made it clear that I can't take any more abuse or feel any more guilt. I've always tried so hard and I've made mistakes but I can't be forced to pay the price any longer. It's not because I don't love her........it's more because I do! She really has to learn to treat me with more respect and love. I don't hold out much hope because she's lived her life expecting far more than is humanly possible and not appreciating peoples limitations. I feel freer and more positive although not exactly happy yet, but I'm sure that comes with time. Thank Goodness the sun's shining <img class="smiley" src="http://www.blog.co.uk/srv/tinymce/jss/plugins/blogdeemotions/smilies/05biggrin.gif" border="0" alt="" width="15" height="15"> <a href="http://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/28/the_worm_turns~1990245/#comments">Comments</a> I've laid down the ground rules at last. I've made it clear that I can't take any more abuse or feel any more guilt. I've always tried so hard and I've made mistakes but I can't be forced to pay the price any longer. It's not because I don't love her........it's more because I do! She really has to learn to treat me with more respect and love. I don't hold out much hope because she's lived her life expecting far more than is humanly possible and not appreciating peoples limitations. I feel freer and more positive although not exactly happy yet, but I'm sure that comes with time.

Thank Goodness the sun's shining

Comments

]]>I want to think good thoughts againhttp://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/23/i_want_to_think_good_thoughts_again~1959521/2007-03-23T12:53:52+01:00 Things are going round and round in my head. I'm reeling from the last couple of weeks. Trying to understand why? Why now, why would she do so much harm to people who love her? Why doesn't she seem to care about her actions? Why can't I reach out to her? Trying to understand when? When did it get this bad? When did it start? When (if ever) will it end? Trying to understand How? How am I ever going to 'move on'? How am I going to carry on? How can I help? How can I forget? How can I forgive? Trying very hard to think good thoughts again. Nearly three weeks ago I was on such a high. The last few years everyone seemed settled and happy. Coping with their ups and downs, living and learning. Then everything changed in a second. Since then I've been trying so hard to understand and get back some equilibrium. Why is it so hard to think good positive thoughts now? When will it get easier? <a href="http://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/23/i_want_to_think_good_thoughts_again~1959521/#comments">Comments</a> Things are going round and round in my head. I'm reeling from the last couple of weeks.

Trying to understand why?
Why now, why would she do so much harm to people who love her? Why doesn't she seem to care about her actions? Why can't I reach out to her?

Trying to understand when?
When did it get this bad? When did it start? When (if ever) will it end?

Trying to understand How?
How am I ever going to 'move on'? How am I going to carry on? How can I help? How can I forget? How can I forgive?

Trying very hard to think good thoughts again. Nearly three weeks ago I was on such a high. The last few years everyone seemed settled and happy. Coping with their ups and downs, living and learning. Then everything changed in a second. Since then I've been trying so hard to understand and get back some equilibrium.
Why is it so hard to think good positive thoughts now? When will it get easier?

Comments

]]>Thank Goodness It's Fridayhttp://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/16/thank_goodness_it_s_friday~1914549/2007-03-16T11:25:26+01:00 I'm so very glad it's Friday, it's been a week of ups, downs and in-betweens but I made another week. I so want to get back to normal and put last week behind me and I'm sure I will soon but I sooooo hate this part of the process. I've been really lucky cos the boss was away for a week when I got back to work so at least I didn't have him to face while I'm getting it back together. He's back Monday so the countdown is on to get it together.....or at least to look as though it's together until the evenings. I really can't decide if having a deadline is a good thing or not. Is it better to have a limited time to heal or is it better to let things evolve naturally? The only thing I'm absolutely sure about at the moment is that I don't want the boss to know...He will only do his usual pretend to care so that he can think we're close then I'll have that mess to sort out again which is the last thing I need right now. I wish I hadn't thought of that side of things right now, it really doesn't help!! Ok time to get immersed in work and do the stuff I've been putting off for too long so that I can leave here this evening and enjoy myself. <a href="http://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/16/thank_goodness_it_s_friday~1914549/#comments">Comments</a> I'm so very glad it's Friday, it's been a week of ups, downs and in-betweens but I made another week.

I so want to get back to normal and put last week behind me and I'm sure I will soon but I sooooo hate this part of the process.

I've been really lucky cos the boss was away for a week when I got back to work so at least I didn't have him to face while I'm getting it back together. He's back Monday so the countdown is on to get it together.....or at least to look as though it's together until the evenings.

I really can't decide if having a deadline is a good thing or not. Is it better to have a limited time to heal or is it better to let things evolve naturally?

The only thing I'm absolutely sure about at the moment is that I don't want the boss to know...He will only do his usual pretend to care so that he can think we're close then I'll have that mess to sort out again which is the last thing I need right now. I wish I hadn't thought of that side of things right now, it really doesn't help!!

Ok time to get immersed in work and do the stuff I've been putting off for too long so that I can leave here this evening and enjoy myself.

Comments

]]>Help I'm becoming an addict!!http://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/15/help_i_m_becoming_an_addict~1908601/2007-03-15T11:36:04+01:00 I love it here <img class="smiley" src="http://www.blog.co.uk/srv/tinymce/jss/plugins/blogdeemotions/smilies/icon_cheeze.gif" border="0" alt="" width="18" height="18"> It's wacky, it's profound, it's funny, it's cheeky, it's just great reading peoples thoughts and feelings. Randomly clicking on a Title or tag never really knowing what you're going to get. Only problem is I'm supposed to be working <img class="smiley" src="http://www.blog.co.uk/srv/tinymce/jss/plugins/blogdeemotions/smilies/smiley-surprised2.gif" border="0" alt="" width="18" height="18"> <a href="http://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/15/help_i_m_becoming_an_addict~1908601/#comments">Comments</a> I love it here

It's wacky, it's profound, it's funny, it's cheeky, it's just great reading peoples thoughts and feelings. Randomly clicking on a Title or tag never really knowing what you're going to get.

Only problem is I'm supposed to be working

Comments

]]>I'm hung over but so refreshed I don't carehttp://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/14/i_m_hung_over_but_so_refreshed_i_don_t_c~1901950/2007-03-14T11:42:18+01:00 A great night out with great friends did me the world of good, downside is I'm really hung over, upside is THE SUN IS SHINING. Roller skates at the ready and ready to roll <img src="/img/smilies/icon_biggrin.gif" alt=":D" class="middle" border="0"> What are the tags for? <a href="http://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/14/i_m_hung_over_but_so_refreshed_i_don_t_c~1901950/#comments">Comments</a> A great night out with great friends did me the world of good, downside is I'm really hung over, upside is THE SUN IS SHINING.

Roller skates at the ready and ready to roll

What are the tags for?

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]]>Isn't life confusing.http://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/13/isn_t_life_confusing~1896146/2007-03-13T12:16:09+01:00 I'm still not getting it <img src="http://www.blog.co.uk/srv/tinymce/jss/plugins/blogdeemotions/smilies/graysigh.gif" border="0" alt="" width="15" height="24"> (Life that is!) Just when I think I know something after thinking and pondering and sometimes just (dare I say it?) taking stuff for granted, along comes something or someone that blows that theory out of the water.... I guess the biggest revelation right now is that I'm just not getting it..... Hey ho maybe I never will, or maybe I never should, or maybe I might. The only thing I know right now is that I don't get it.... Meanwhile back to work and stuff <a href="http://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/13/isn_t_life_confusing~1896146/#comments">Comments</a> I'm still not getting it

(Life that is!)

Just when I think I know something after thinking and pondering and sometimes just (dare I say it?) taking stuff for granted, along comes something or someone that blows that theory out of the water....
I
guess the biggest revelation right now is that I'm just not getting it..... Hey ho maybe I never will, or maybe I never should, or maybe I might. The only thing I know right now is that I don't get it....

Meanwhile back to work and stuff

Comments

]]>Isn't life confusing.http://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/13/isn_t_life_confusing~1896117/2007-03-13T12:08:29+01:00 I'm still not getting it <img src="http://www.blog.co.uk/srv/tinymce/jss/plugins/blogdeemotions/smilies/graysigh.gif" border="0" alt="" width="15" height="24"> (Life that is!) Just when I think I know something after thinking and pondering and sometimes just (dare I say it?) taking stuff for granted, along comes something or someone that blows that theory out of the water.... I guess the biggest revelation right now is that I'm just not getting it..... Hey ho maybe I never will, or maybe I never should, or maybe I might. The only thing I know right now is that I don't get it.... Meanwhile back to work and stuff <a href="http://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/13/isn_t_life_confusing~1896117/#comments">Comments</a> I'm still not getting it

(Life that is!)

Meanwhile back to work and stuff

Comments

]]>I've Made It!!http://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/02/i_ve_made_it~1832691/2007-03-02T11:33:15+01:00 Wow this is my very first ever blog and I'm wondering if there's anyboday out there reading it? I'm here wondering if anybody wants to know anything about me? I hear a lot these days about blogs, I assume people just write whatever they want and off they go? Advice, tips, feedback are all welcome <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> <a href="http://laidebird.blog.co.uk/2007/03/02/i_ve_made_it~1832691/#comments">Comments</a> Wow this is my very first ever blog and I'm wondering if there's anyboday out there reading it?

I'm here wondering if anybody wants to know anything about me?

I hear a lot these days about blogs, I assume people just write whatever they want and off they go?

Advice, tips, feedback are all welcome

Comments

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